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Monday, February 23, 2009

Reality Bites

Mood: neutral-to-sad

LIFE, is an extremely complicated rollercoaster.
- No matter how crazily happy you'd feel when you're riding it, at one point you get a dose of reality that with the thrill it has comes a reality that the feeling can just go away in an instant.

This is exactly what happened to me from February 21 (Saturday) until February 22 (Sunday).

Our Student Council-organized benefit concert entitled, "MDC Gives 2009: Rock for a Cause" featuring local bands such as: Bamboo, Sandwich, and Sugarfree was a success - in terms of execution. But on other terms, it ain't - and I refuse to disclose it in public for reasons of confidentiality.

I was hyped-up then because I was jumping to one of my favorite songs ("Sugod" by Sandwich) as I held in my hands 40K. Then at one point, I shook hands with Bamboo's road manager; even being complimented at as "being pretty". And being able to share a piece of conversation with Ira Cruz and Nathan Azarcon of the band Bamboo - getting their autographs for our posters and getting them to autograph our shirts. Then, talking to the man of the hour: BAMBOO!

It was exhilarating, alright. It was even one of the greatest moments of my life to be there listening to some of their feel-good music. But still, I think I'm lost. Amidst the fact that someone was actually encouraging me to still run for the next Council elections; and getting my new "lucky penny" on the concert grounds; there was something... wrong. And I can feel it.

Then, when we went home my mom said it all. She is planning to go to our province to visit my bed-ridden lola during Holy Week, and she asked me if I wanted to come. It drove me to tears because I knew for a fact that lola won't live that long. And I remember my mom saying that my lola was looking for me after she was discharged from the hospital, after suffering from stroke. She said, "Where is Nadine? Has she graduated already?". I cried because I didn't know that she still cares long enough to ask that question.

And the next news was tragic. Last night, around 8 in the evening I was browsing through my multiply account when I opened an intriguing online news article. It was about one of my school mates back in highschool whom I've worked with in theater. Her name is Mary Beatrice Saludares. The news just gave me a shock! She was in the US to fulfill her lifelong dream of becoming a renowed ballerina, and yet her dreams were crushed by one stupid guy who ran her over with his car as she crossed Route 24 of Edgewood Road at Maryland. She was then on tour with her ballet company, "The Washington Ballet Company".

It was really sad. And I'm mourning over the loss of a fine person. The way I remember her, she was very friendly, radiant, and sincere person. And whenever she dances, it just takes your breath away, and you get captivated by her. She is a woman full of potential, and destined to become a great ballerina.

I hope that those who are also mourning her passing, let's just pray for her. I'm sure that wherever Mary is right now she's in a good place, and she will forever be dancing in that better place.

Rest in peace, Mary Saludares. And may Eternal Light shine upon you.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

How Sweet... Your Lies Are!

Mood: disheartened

It's ironic how your life changes in a matter of 10 seconds.

Words hold the great power of being indelible, that you can lose yourself when it hits you right in the face... especially when it comes from the person you least expect.

But nonetheless, I'm nearly as thankful as hell. Because if it wasn't for it, I'd still be standing in the middle of nowhere... trying to figure out the right path.

To that someone who spilled things out: thank you for being as honest as possible.

To that someone who'll get slapped on the face by this post: I don't need you, I want you to realize that. Like I said, "I don't need a lesser person to complete me."

Sunday, February 1, 2009

You've Got To Be Kidding

Mood: mentally-drained

What the freaking hell has befallen upon me?

First, our thesis group was dissolved; just when I finished most of Chapter 1 and ready for a 2nd meeting with our adviser. What a waste of good thesis material... and topic.

Second, I was transferred to another thesis group. Enough said.

Third, I flunked a quiz for the Cardiovascular System. That's going to pull my grade one way or another. Arrrrggghh!

Fourth, we sat down for a meeting with Dr. Fausto (Research Coordinator). It was... a bit enlightening... yet, depressing.

Fifth, our RLE group (as well as the others in school) had a skills role play. Ohmygod, humiliation!

Sixth, me & Arvic presented our concept map for Myocardial Infarction during RLE. It was okay, so-so. At least it resulted to a good learning experience!

Seventh, why is it so hard to find related studies online regarding body mechanics? Damn.

Eighth, our RLE group is yet to have case topics for our upcoming grand case presentation on the 14th. We are so dead!

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I am very much aware that I shouldn't complain, since it becomes a hindrance to God's blessings in our lives. But this is just ridiculous!

I just wish things will start turning up for the better this coming week.

*sigh*